I hear my daughter’s voice, “It’s just water Mom”, as I brave up, get on the board and paddle out—preparing for and facing the unknown and the new. I am learning to trust on terms not completely of my own design. And…I have a pair of 9 year-old eyes eagerly watching me.
Life in Mexico this past year and a half is teaching me how to ‘let it go’ and ‘turn it over’ to a larger, unregulated, natural system of checks and balances, much like the ocean in her infinite wisdom.
At 44, I finally dove in and learned how to surf—a dream come true of my husband’s no doubt, one that just might crown me the “perfect wife”—or just a more well-rounded version of the one I already am!
I was terrified of getting that big 9-foot long board into the water, with waves coming at me in all directions, and God only knows WHAT dangling under my legs….cue in the Jaws theme song!
My first time out was on a windy, choppy day—not the ‘ideal surfing conditions’ according to my instructor—BUT, I did it!!!! I was up on that board on my first wave, riding a high like no other, with an ear-to-ear grin. Several more successful stand ups, and staying on the board for more than a few seconds at a time, and the joy and confidence began to build!
After a lot of wipe outs and progressing into spending more time on the top of the board vs. the underside of it, and actually beginning to forget about what might be circling underneath my body and board, I left that first surfing experience exhilarated beyond words.
Being out there in the water, I am weightless, ageless, lifeFULL, smiling the entire darn time!
I hoisted up and strapped down the surfboard on top of the car all by my little self (another accomplishment!), turned up the music, and cried and laughed all the way home from the pure, unbridled joy, excitement and complete exhilaration of it! No doubt a passerby might have thought me crazy by the absolute giddiness I was exuding from inside my car.
I walked right into, through, and out on the other side of a previously held huge fear, and emerged a better, brighter and more soulful version of me!